I am a proud working wife, full time criminal justice student, and mother of one 2 year old. It can be challenging at many times I admit,but with the help of my lovely husband we manage to get it done. We have opposite work and school schedules to start off with. So this can cause issues with myself getting rest and school work done in a timely manner. Somehow we always make it work because we have to both meet sacrifices to be able to handle this challenge. Making a mental schedule and making sure everyone is on the same boat as me was hard when I decided to go back to work last Februrary. This meant more time out of the home, being less energetic, and changing the whole household routines. I figured that working, being a parent, wife, and student full time was not as bad as I thought it to be because I knew many people that succeeded at doing the same things together and they lived to tell it.
When I tell you that I almost went crazy the first few months of work and school together as a mommy, I really mean it. I went from waking up to a child to tend to a toddler and then taking care of chores/errands accordingly, to getting all of the household duties plus more done before work. My head would spin plenty of times because of myself being the main person only able to handle of all these jobs due to my husband’s long work hours. I eventually figured out that I do not have any routine or goals to meet but for anyone other than my family. My husband after he gets home never had an issue with helping with tasks and getting our child to bed, so I do not know why I would try to be superwoman anyway. As long as I told him what day of the week and what times I needed to focus on my online assignments alone,he was a trooper and went along with the plans smoothly. My daughter on the other hand, has to have my attention at every moment I near her. So until this very day when I am doing assignments that need focus, I have to make sure she is fully occupied and my husband is watching her . Since I go to school online, certain assignments have deadlines and others I can login to submit more than once in a day, so this part is not an issue ever. Online schooling is very flexible and convienant, but has its times that you have to be fully focused though.
I have my crazy schedule together now moving fast foward 1 year and a half later. It is different now since I went from working 2pm until 1030pm when I first started my job to the shift of 11am until 7am. I sleep during the day and not at night, so it would not be fair to force my daughter into a schedule similar to mines just for me to get sleep I feel. I would rather accomodate myself and husband’s schedule around hers as much as we can. What ends up happening is I sleep for a few hours when I get in after giving myself and her breakfast from 9am until 1pm, then lunch/cartoon/school work time. My husband watches her after work and after our family dinner time from 6pm until about 930pm, then up and get ready to leave for work by 1015pm. My daughter at times will leave her room if she is bored of playing with toys or done with nap time to jump in the bed to shake me til I wake up on many occasions when I am home alone for any reason. My household is a circus during my work days mainly, but we still find time to keep some kind of order until our off days.
I feel like family time is important no matter how tired and out of energy we are. We accomodate family time into one day a week and focus on just us three with no other distractions. This day we make sure there is no homework, no one on call for over time, and appointments scheduled that will modify our plans for the day in any way. I think it is important to have some kind of balance in your home, but there are times you will fall off balance. Our family is a great example of this plenty of times during the work week, but we never allow the stress from the confusions to ruin our feelings either. I will admit that a toddler seems harder to raise while working and being a student. I say this because there is potty training, preparing for school age with educational activities, and just plenty of stages being experienced at this age. I sometimes feel bad that I do not have all of the time to give her for these things, but I know that by both of us having a career and getting our higher education is what is best for her in the long run. I think to myself is missing certain milestones, taking away from the constant stay at home parent time, and not being there to tuck my child in bed are really things that I need to beat myself up over? My answer to this is no, because I believe whatever works in one home or for certain kids may not always for the next. People have careers that are more demanding and some that are less, but they still and can be great parents in the end. As I mom I know that I can always find a way to make my daughter a priority, and being raised by loving parents that are doing what is in her best interest to give her what she needs in life physically and mentally according to our lifestyle is the best way to do so.Tweet